Poppies and Daisies.

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This is my sanctuary
Jotted with my occasional, random outbursts.

Berate my musings and I not,
Lest for abler pens,
For I do not care.

cheers!

foong sheng qi olivia.
08 february '91

snsj reddds '07
cjc odac BXI

[ 9:48 AM ]

My sister is sickening.

she keeps taking my clothes without permission and there're so many reasons why that is sickening. and i mean sick-en-ing!

I believe that what you wear will set the tone for how your day will be like. and i usually will know what i want to wear the next day because number1, i usually rush out of the house so i don't take forever sitting in front of the wardrobe contemplating what to wear. number2, i get extremely annoyed when i can't find the exact piece of garment i have in my mide and will end up finding 3 cupboards, mine, my sis and my mum's and it get freakingly annoying that my clothes end on my sister's back when i spent like forever hunting it. best thing is, she doesn't even ask permission!
when i want to wear that particular piece of clothing means i WANT to wear THAT piece and no other. not to say i don't have any other but what i want will also so coincidentally disappear when i want it and then magically appear on my sister! wow. i get so irritated looking for my clothes that it totally starts my day off on a horrid note and leaving the house in a bad mood usually does no wonder for the rest of my day.
it's not as if she doesn't buy her own clothes. no doubt my clothes are definitely way more than hers but so? i mean i don't mind sharing but sharing goes both ways. she always ends up buying some rubbish piece of rag that obviously i wouldn't wear and ya it stays in her cupboard for one year without being touched till the next spring cleaning. and then, she ends up wearing MINE clothes, again. like w.t.f?
more often than not i end up spending my money on clothes and skipping meals while she happily gets her pocket money and goes off gallivanting. come on. i buy clothes for myself, it ends up for 3 people - my sister, mum and of course myself, and i don't even get reimbursed. best thing is my mum complains that i buy too much clothes?! not even many, but much. seriously what is this? how about go tell your second daughter to get some decent piece of cloth for herself so i can end up buying less and maybe, 'sharing? i totally refuse to even look at the hideous things she and her kuku brain buys. doesn't matter anyway, her clothes are meant to be kept in the cupboard. 'like what? a bright green spaggetti top with brown circular designs? not everyday is save-the-earth day yo?
and i seriously seriously hate it when she always criticises the things that i buy but then always ends up wearing them like it absolutely normal for her to do that. which sane person actually criticizes and then wear what you criticize?! for what i ask?
when she searches for clothes in my cupboard, she actually messes up the sequence of things in it. sorry to say that i have OCD but yea keep hands off my things because i'll know it if you so much as to shift 1 t-shirt. and then it messes up all my order and i have to find everything all over again. i don't have the luxury of time every morning because i'm so goddamn tired and in a mad rush.
damn it i cannot let it go throughout the day when i don't get my way. i'll blame every single thing that went wrong on wearing the undesired clothes and the frustration builds up throughout the day. it's gonna give me high blood pressure or heart attack la.

this must be the oldest child syndrome of extreme selfishness.

but it irks me so when people mess up my day.

and to start a good day off, you must have the correct clothes with the correct gan jue.

and i wholeheartedly believe in that.

i'm a bitch.

but so be it.

[ 5:03 AM ]

they are back.

i won't have to imagine what they're doing over in indonesia while i'm stuck here.

i love them.

i love mr lim.

[ 7:11 PM ]

If i didn't know what a large chunk of my heart he will take when he leaves,

i know now...

puffy eyes today, again.

this must stop...

i hate it that i'm so freaking affected

but i just don't know how to stop it

good tears are good,

only when they don't empty themselves continuously from your tears ducts.

because when that happens, everything else is just irritating

i annoy, myself.

[ 3:57 AM ]

my mum, has officially gotten to my nerves now.

she can dream about having a response from me now.

[ 5:52 AM ]

i swear i ate so much today that i'll just die from fats overdose.

and i ate curry twice today!

gosh my tummy hurts!

i'm so happy to see who i saw today [:

i love people who can make me smile and feel at ease.

there's no need for fronts and pretense

and even senseless ramblings are infinitely enjoyable.

i'm very pleased.

[ 7:03 AM ]

chick vs dick is freaking funny i tell you!

i think kaykay is pretty

and both dick and her have got chemistry.

it's interesting to watch their retarded acts la (:

ji jian li if you're reading this,

i've got a score to settle with you!

call my house.

[ 6:25 AM ]

kns my dad stopped me from drinking beer?!

!@#$%^&*((*&^%$

sometimes i wonder what will happen if i suddenly sprout a string of vulgarities.

-muses-

[ 6:12 AM ]

shopping from monday to friday!

super shagged and legs super tired!

monday to thursday, helping other to find prom dress.

today finally productive!

spend super alot of money ready.

i need a job!

any job lobangs people?!

[ 8:03 AM ]

stubby fingers, rosy cheeks, noiseless kid,

oh-so-cuteeee

[ 8:04 PM ]

omgzzz this is freaky!

yesterday night my sister said that she came into my room to off the lights.

and i woke up and started scolding here.

best thing is i don't even have any recollection of it mans!

and my mum once mentioned that she lock up the window grills at night

so that i won't jump off the building when i walk around the house at night

AND i didn't even know i do that!

haha this is so cool! maybe tonight i'll walk downstairs and have supper at the 24hr coffeeshop,

without even knowing it again! -chuckles-

j1 xp today.

hope all goes well for them.

let's say this is their story to tell and their pages to colour.

i feel so... nostalgic now.

-heavy sighs-

i havn't talked to many people in a long time.

time to do some catching up and seriously just, talk.

i wonder if mr lim wants to talk to me.

-muses-

but i've got nothing to say to him (:

this is such a random post.

i love you peeps!

-big, wet, sloppy kiss-

[ 11:53 PM ]

correct me if i'm wrong,

but i think that dedication is for me.

isn't it?

[ 5:20 PM ]

my mother said i peeped at a boy,

because i have a stye in my eye.

i read shuh's blog and like her,

i'm on the verge of tears at almost everything.

i should learn to be stronger too.

i think it's quite irritating that people keep seeing you cry,

i really do try to control and not let them see

but the control's slipping since the beginning of prelims

and my mood swings are terrible,

yet i have never thought of being suicidal,

despite all the other depressing thoughts.

my oh my,

i can't stand myself now.

so much about me, me and still me,

little about the much vaster world.

i await with bated breath the end of this -points wildly-

and pray for cessation of time for next april to never arrive

in the name of the father, and of the son, and of the holy spirit,

amen.

[ 4:36 AM ]